Returning to work after parental leave can be emotionally challenging. The first day back might bring a mix of guilt, anxiety, and stress. Adjusting to being a ‘working parent’ poses a unique challenge, notes Amy Beacom, founder of the Center for Parental Leave Leadership. Many parents face the difficulty of adapting to new roles under pressure, often without adequate sleep, guidance, or support. This is particularly true for mothers in the U.S., where federal paid leave is unavailable. A 2012 report revealed that 1 in 4 women return to work within two weeks of childbirth. Even with months of paid leave, the transition back can feel overwhelming.
Practical Tips for a Smoother Transition
Beacom advises that parents engage in proactive planning to ease their return. Here are some steps to consider:
- Discuss and plan a return strategy with your manager before going on leave. Setting expectations beforehand can help both parties feel prepared.
- Schedule a brief check-in with your employer during your leave. This ensures both you and your employer remain informed and confident about your upcoming return.
- Consider returning mid-week to allow a gradual adjustment. This can help you ease back into work and manage your inbox before a full workweek.
- Negotiate flexible schedule arrangements. Adjusting your start time or aligning with different time zones might simplify commutes or childcare logistics. Workplace flexibility often requires you to initiate these conversations.
Embrace ‘Good Enough’
Darby Saxbe, a brain researcher, observes that many parents find work easier post-children due to enhanced discipline and efficiency. Nonetheless, this doesn’t imply a seamless experience. When feeling overwhelmed, adopt a mindset where ‘good’ suffices. Saxbe encourages parents to lower their standards. Avoid striving for perfection in all aspects, as accolades aren’t awarded for every task.
Reshma Saujani, CEO of Moms First, advises intentionality in adding responsibilities. Determine what is necessary versus merely a recognition effort. Consider where pressures are self-imposed or unavoidable. Importantly, be forgiving of yourself. Saxbe highlights that parenthood brings significant biological and psychological changes, with adjustment taking months or even years. He counsels patience and self-acceptance during this transformative period.