The renowned author and podcast host, Mel Robbins, shared an insightful lesson from her time as a waitress on the importance of understanding social dynamics for earning generous tips. During her early career at the Red Rooster Tavern in Michigan, Robbins received guidance from a mentor on identifying who influences the tipping decision.
Lesson from a Mentor
Robbins recounted to The Wall Street Journal that her mentor advised her to focus on the women at the table, despite the common belief that the person paying the bill, often a man, primarily decides the tip. “What typically happens,” Robbins mentioned, “is that when the server has provided great service, the women will often suggest to their partners to reward the server with a good tip.” This advice led Robbins to prioritize providing exceptional service to women.
Industry Opinions
“I don’t entirely disagree,” stated Robert Mahon, managing partner at Mahon Hospitality Group in New York.
While some in the hospitality industry, like Mahon, acknowledge the influence women can have over tipping decisions, they emphasize the importance of treating all guests with equal attention. Mahon remarked that, ideally, servers should assess the group’s dynamics rather than favoring one gender.
The Role of Interpersonal Interactions
Research supports the idea that interpersonal interaction plays a significant role in tipping behavior. In a study by John S. Seiter and Harry Weger Jr., four servers attended to 360 parties, sometimes complimenting patrons on their choices. The findings showed that compliments led to significantly higher tips, highlighting the impact of seemingly small gestures on gratuity amounts.
Expert Advice
Lisa Burdette, the founder of the Dallas School of Etiquette, noted that while women can influence a man’s tipping decision, it is crucial for servers to provide attentive service to everyone. Burdette advised avoiding any debates over gratuity at the table, stressing that the person covering the bill ultimately makes the tipping decision.
Peter Burke, a lifestyle editor at Fox News Digital, specializes in topics related to food and drink, offering readers insights into varied lifestyle subjects.